so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
