You can't motorboat a personality
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I am mentally ready for anal.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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