i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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