i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
