Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
