Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I look excited, but its just a facade.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
