i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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