No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?