idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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