belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'm at about main and main street
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
