The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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