His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
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I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
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Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
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