I threw up into my coffee this morning.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
