There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
