So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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