no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I can't turn off my feet"
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
