Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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