you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Just high enough for therapy.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
