Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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