I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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