You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Randomize
