so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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