ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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