scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
