If i come over, it means nothing
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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