I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
