You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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