My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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