I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
