I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
