I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
