I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
