you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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