using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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