Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize