Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
