I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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