whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
