i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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