do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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