i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
