I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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