Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
