should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
