I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
