You're a womanizer and a bitch.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
