I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
