matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
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