Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
