i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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